You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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