love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
