please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
my liver is dry heaving
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize