but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
