Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
this will be a night to untag.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
