My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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