Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
