he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
