I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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