I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
