Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
