found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
