So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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