Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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