He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
