I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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