They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Will exercising make me less horny?
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