whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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