we have officially lost it.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
as a side note pls kill me
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
