so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
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