I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Randomize
