Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
As shirtless as possible
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
