Barsexuality is the new black.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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