you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
