Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
