I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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