Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Randomize
