Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
they're like a gay fantastic four
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
