I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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