Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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