I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
