rhymes with "ouble enetration"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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