i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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