Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
If its not for food we ain't going out.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
