If that was your dad, he is hot
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
