My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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