so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
