what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
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