Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
