it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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