Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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