if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
