i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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