I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
