walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
