So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
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