Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I don't think brook has ever known best
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm at about main and main street
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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