VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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