worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
