i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
These tits shall not be calmed
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I'm always down for nudity.
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