Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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