It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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