He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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