Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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