? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
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